I found an old diary while putting clutter in a
storage box. This is the entry from 37 years ago, and because of the date…I thought I would put it in my blog.
SEPTEMBER 10, 1982
She is the apple of my eye, firstborn, pride, and, like
every other stubborn child, a cause of momentary stress.
Despite her petite frame, she is unquestionably cute,
outgoing, and unafraid – a display of adventurism at an earlier age.
She
learned household chores earlier because she had no playmate but her mom. My wife assigned her to turn off the range when the rice had
boiled.
“Anak,
huwag ka muna magulo at kumokulo ang tiyan ko.” (Child, please stop bothering
me for a while. My abdomen is bubbling.”
“Patayin
mo na mommy.” (turn it off, mommy), she replied innocently.
She
could read all the letters of the alphabet, but writing was initially difficult because her motor coordination was not yet fully developed. She would scribble unintelligible
lines on a piece of paper.
“Daddy,
daddy,” she would excitedly yelp, “O” or “Daddy! “N,” and she would rock excitedly.
Learning
to write letters such as O, F, and T is nothing surprising, but learning to write
“H”
Finding it hard to write “N” and learning to write “R” while being unable to write “P”
is puzzling.
She
memorized the alphabet so perfectly that she could recognize a letter in any position except for one setback—I said it was a double U (W). Still, she insisted it was an inverted “M.” This led the two of us to argue until I had to postpone the session, or we would end up quarreling and she crying, which is very uncomfortable.
This
is “S.” I was holding her hand, scribbling the letter “S,” which is easy to
remember because it looks like a snake. It’s like a worm, I said.
“Daddy,
lagyan mo ng tubig,” (Daddy, put water beneath it), so I scribbled lines
beneath the letter “S” without understanding what she was trying to say.
“Tingnan
mo daddy, bebe – hindi ahas at hindi bulate.” (Look, daddy; it’s a duck, neither
a snake nor a worm). Her sense of association is stunningly intelligent.
“Aray,
ang sakit, nakakita ako ng stars,” her mom moaned as she was accidentally hit by
her with her toy. (Arg! That was hard…I saw stars from the impact.)
“E
moon mommy, wala?” (How about the moon, Mommy…there is none?)
She
could sometimes be emotionally sentimental, cry at will, or suddenly fall silent when she heard sad songs at home or inside our car.
I was about to leave for work when she insisted on coming. She cried and would only stop if I gave her money, but she would only accept coins. My wife made signs for me to go into the other room, where she kept her treasure box full of coins, so I did.
When I left the room, she stopped crying and turned to her mom – “Talagang
tanga ang daddy, ano?” (Daddy is easily fooled, isn’t he?) and giggled, only to
resume crying as soon as I reentered the room.
She
had a quarrel with her mom one night. She cried, and nothing could pacify her. The generator was switched off, so we were left virtually in the dark, relying on the kerosene lamp and candlelight. I threatened to lock her in the dark if she wouldn’t stop. At 4:00 a.m., I woke up from her sobbing. I was worried about why she cried for so long.
“Norayda,
please. I couldn’t sleep,” I said, and I got the flashlight. She was climbing down from the bed when I turned on the light.
“Where
are you going?” I asked.
“Sa
kabilang kuwarto ako tutulog para hindi ko kayo gugulo.” (I will sleep in the
other room so I won’t disturb you).
She
broke my heart with those remarks, upon which I walked around the bed and reached out to her. She put her arms around my neck, afraid that I would slap
her, which I never did, never!
“Bakit
anak, umaga na umiiyak ka pa?” (Child, why are you still crying? It’s almost
morning.)
“Kaseh
daddy, sumasakit nanaman ang ipin ko.” (Because, Dad, it’s my toothache again.)
Bakit
hindi mo sinabi? (Why didn’t you tell me?)
Kaseh…tulog
ka na e! (Because you are already asleep)
I
opened the drawer where I kept meds for her toothache.
Two
months ago, while we were on vacation leave, she and I were sitting on the terrace
of our house.
“Daddy,
bakit ang tagal tagal ko lalaki? Iinip na ako. Gusto ko ng aral.” (Daddy, why
is it taking too long for me to grow up. I am feeling impatient. I want to go
to school)
And
when I left for Saudi Arabia alone so she and her mom could spend their 6-month visa at home, my younger brother came for a visit.
“Bakit
ka umiiyak?” (Why are you crying?) my wife asked while she was sitting in the
corner, sobbing.
“Kaseh
dumating pala daddy ko, hindi man lang ako halik.” (Because my dad came home
and he didn’t even kiss me.)
She
mistook my brother for me.’
I
made her a small cabinet where she can keep her toys, but the top looks like a
table. While I was in the hospital, she said to her mom, “Ang daddy talaga
walang utak. Gumawa ng mesa wala naman upuan. Paano ko gagamitin?” (Daddy
really has no brain. He made me a table, but without a chair. How can I use
it?) I had to buy her a small table with a small chair.
When
she and her mom spent the night at the nurses’ hostel, they would join the
nurses in playing bingo. They would let Norayda draw and read the numbers, and sometimes she would read them from right to left. It would send the
nurses’ laughter to the roof, especially when someone was waiting to play Bingo with numbers she would read as “64” but actually meant “46.”
She
usually sleeps late and wakes up late, just in time for her mom to take a nap.
“Norayda,
please be quiet while you play. I need to take a nap.”
“Bakit
mommy, hindi na nga kita gugulo kahit na gutom na gutom ako.” (Why mommy, I am
not bothering you even if feel very hungry.)
My
wife, suddenly feeling guilty for forgetting her breakfast, got out of bed and prepared her breakfast.
She
developed a special liking for the ABBA song “Chiquitita.” She wants it played
every night to help her sleep, meaning I have to get up and rewind the cassette every time until she falls asleep. It was tiring for me until I thought of… yeah, record the same song on the whole 60-minute cassette so we can both journey to dreamland at the sound of…ABBA.
